In a sit-down interview with Bianca Gonzalez on “Paano Ba ‘To,” Kim Chiu and Paulo Avelino opened upabout their perspectives on relationships, love, and life. Through an engaging “He Said, She Said” episode,the lead stars of “The Alibi: Ang Buong Katotohanan” alternated in answering Bianca’s questions, offeringpersonal insights and contrasting viewpoints.
Love without limits, or magtira ka para sa sarili mo?
Filipinos are often divided when it comes to defining the healthy limits of expressing love. From herexperience, Kim has always believed in giving her all in a relationship, rather than holding back to reservesomething for herself.
Though she admitted her belief is not for everyone, she firmly embraced a love without reservations. She viewed her past relationships as valuable life experiences. “Para wala akong pagsisihan sa sarili ko,” Kim said, “[Na] sana ginawa ko ‘to, sana naging gan’yan ako.”
She acknowledged that her answer isn’t the typical choice. Kim explained, “Masama kasi ang sobra, tiyak na mahirap maka-recover kapag nag-all out ka emotionally, physically.” Still, she likes to live life without regrets, even going as far as to pour 80% of herself to her partner.
Much to some people’s surprise, Paulo shared similar views. For him, life is too short not to give our all in everything we do—especially in love. He elaborated, “May kulang kang hindi na-e-experience sa sarili mo, at may kulang kang hindi naibibigay sa ibang tao.”
He related to Kim’s struggle of recovering after giving everything in a relationship. When Paulo recalled those difficult times, it felt as though the world was ending. Things became more manageable once he moved past that stage in his life. “You get to realize everything you learned, everything you have to improve on,” he reflected, “Kaya naman pala. Okay lang mag-all out.
Dapat ba na may access ang partner mo to your phone?
Kim replied with a quick “no.” She shared that in her first relationship, she learned that going through apartner’s phone only instigates conflict between couples. For her, it’s better to rely on her partner’shonesty and trust that they will come clean if needed. “Sana maging honest na lang,” Kim said.“Konsensiya na lang nung lalaki na maging honest sa’yo. ’Wag na ’yung ikaw ’yung makaalam kasi masmasakit.”
Bianca then flipped the script, asking how the “It’s Showtime” host would feel if her partner snoopedthrough her phone instead. For Kim, it wouldn’t matter—as long as she protects her peace.
On one hand, Paulo suggested that it’s mostly women who check their partner’s phones, often for validreasons. “Sa akin naman, I believe that the best relationships are built on trust,” he said. He even citedBianca and her husband’s marriage as an example, noting that it has been going strong for many years.Paulo emphasized that respecting each other’s personal time and privacy goes a long way. He concluded,“At the end of the day… hindi makakaapekto sa relasyon n’yo ‘yung mga bagay na ginagawa n’yo sa sarilin’yong oras.
”On a first date, should a guy pay or dapat split the bill?
Even today, people can’t seem to agree on whether a first date should be paid for by the guy or shared byboth parties.. For Kim, however, she believes that whoever asked the other person out on a date shouldpay. She added, “Kung ako nag-aya sa’yo, ako magbayad. Kung ikaw nag-aya sa’kin, ikaw magbayad.”
Paulo took a more generous approach to the question. When he asked someone out on a date, he assumed the responsibility of paying would fall on him. He said he would cover the cost as long as he was able to.
On occasions when the woman insisted on splitting the bill, Paulo affirmed that he wouldn’t mind—especially if she was adamant. He even joked about paying back in a different way. “Hindi naman natatapakan ‘yung ego ko, or pride ko, or anything.”
Is it okay if the girl makes the first move?
In the Philippines, women who make the first move are often labeled as “flirty.” Paulo acknowledged the country’s conservative stance on the topic, but he said it didn’t bother him at all. He shared, “If it feels right, might as well chase it.” He worried that some women were letting romantic opportunities pass by because of this very notion.
Kim based her answer on her personality, admitting that she was more of a dalagang Filipina. She revealed that she didn’t want to be the first to start a conversation. However, she was willing to make a move once the man showed some romantic interest.
Paulo then raised a clever point. In his view, women had been making the first move for years, albeit in subtle ways—through hair flipping, lingering glances, and eye contact. Though not direct or obvious, this demonstrated that women had always been capable of expressing their affection first.
Kapag ang babae tumatandang single, manang ang tawag. Kapag lalaki naman, bachelor. Kapag babae dates around, malandi. Kapag lalaki, he’s the man.
“I always see a person for who they are,” Paulo said. He never really views women who grow old single as a manang. He agreed that such biases are outdated and noted that his perspective differs from most people’s. For Paulo, he values people by how much they put into their work, rather than the relationships they maintain.
Kim argued that women today are raised differently. “Kung ano kaya ng mga kalalakihan, kaya din ng mga kababaihan,” she explained. She sees manangs as strong, independent women who may come across as intimidating, but who, in reality, are simply career-oriented and goal-driven.
Moreover, Kim encouraged women to empower each other. For her, women should uplift one another instead of pulling each other down.
If your partner has a strong political stance, tapos magkaiba kayo, is it a deal breaker?
Recently, many people have considered politics when looking for relationships, making sure they see eyeto eye with a potential partner. Kim acknowledged that religion and politics are difficult topics to navigate in a relationship. Still, she believes that issues about love and politics are like oil and water. “Hindi siyadeal breaker. Hindi naman natin ma-a-apply sa relasyon natin ‘yan eh,” Kim elaborated. “Relasyon namannatin ‘to eh, mundo natin ‘to.” In the end, she emphasized that relationships are more important to her.
Paulo agreed, understanding that people hold different views. He dislikes trying to sway someone else’s opinion to vote for a particular candidate. He said, “Kung magkaiba tayo ng opinyon, eh ‘di respeto na lang para sa isa’t isa.” He explained that everyone’s votes are equal and that people should be allowed to vote freely. Rather than focusing on politicians themselves, he suggested it’s better to discuss policies.
What for you is one relationship deal breaker that kung mangyari ‘yun, it will make you disappear?
Lack of respect for others is what Paulo considers a deal breaker in a relationship. “Ayoko ng walang respeto sa ibang tao,” he shared. He particularly dislikes it when someone disrespects a server, for example, and he especially dislikes people who aren’t kind to those they work with. Paulo believes that basic manners and conduct are something everyone should have, regardless of wealth or status.
Kim’s answer is simple: “Kapag may iba siya.” She said she would immediately exit a relationship upon discovering that her partner is seeing another woman. Kim added, “Andami na nga natin sa mundo, madami pa kaming mamahalin mo. Dapat isa lang.”
Watch Kim and Paulo as Vincent and Stella in “The Alibi: Ang Buong Katotohanan,” airing weeknights at 8:45 PM on ABS-CBN on ALLTV2, A2Z, iWant, and Kapamilya Online Live (KOL).